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Your Stories
It's over to you!
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If you are looking for somewhere to share your story, in a completely confidential and anonymous way - you can do exactly that here...
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No matter your age, experience or background - I want to hear from you.
Share as much or as little of your story as you feel appropriate.
Are you struggling to receive treatment?
Is your HRT unavailable?
Have you had any unusual symptoms?
Has menopause affected your work?
Been told you're 'too young'?
Feel like you are completely alone in this?
Want to use your voice to raise awareness?
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When I look back, I have been menopausal for almost 10 years, taking HRT for the majority of that time, and whilst most symptoms have subsided, I am still menstruating and still lacking in confidence, with the memory of a stuffed cushion to boot.
Luckily though at 54, I am still alive - my mum had a hysterectomy in her 30's suddenly hitting menopause overnight and sadly dying some years later from ovarian cancer. I have outlived her and whilst I had not expected to, given the family history, I now realise a series of events at a young age made me an absolute candidate for prominent symptoms.
The reason I say that I was always predetermined to suffer considerably with symptoms is because its widely researched that socioeconomic and psychosocial determinants (and a measure of genetics) can contribute to how women experience the transition through menopause.
As I had one sick parent and one absent parent throughout my teens and beyond, death of both parents during my early 20's, loss of my home and a husband in my 30's, and then in my 40's, another failed marriage leaving me with a subsequent low income and two children: Circumstances clearly dictated how I would experience menopause without me having a single clue. I unconsciously "expected" to be sick - my mum was, my dad was - why on earth wouldn't I be?
However, once menopause hit me in my mid 40's my GP put me straight on HRT. But I was so busy treading water with a new job, managing teenage behaviour and anxieties all with zero spousal or parental input; I failed to address the symptoms rationally or with a positive mindset.
Now, in my 50's, as I piece together each decades events, I see there is light at the end of the menopausal tunnel, but it has come at a hefty cost. And I am utterly exhausted by it.
I was sad, and lonely some days. Other days I felt a failure as a mum. Is it my fault their fathers accept no parental responsibility? Am I to blame? I worried about whether they would have equally poor relationships as they grew up. I have worked hard, but maybe not smart. Will they do the same? I am after all, their primary role model.
At work, low self-esteem and impaired memory causes issues. Am I actually an imposter? I am neither young nor intelligent enough to keep up with the ever-changing ebb and flow of nursing in this day and age.
I am getting chunkier, in fact my work tunic zip has split from the bottom up! My arthritic spine is buckling under the pressure and a new diagnosis of microscopic colitis is an interesting curve ball in a world where eating on the go and stopping for a wee only happens when you are fit to burst.
However, whilst symptomwise, sleep evades me and brain fog and low mood prevail, I am very lucky that my hot flushes and sweats were very quickly suppressed by HRT and I can proudly shout that I do not have a dry vagina. Yet.
Katie, 54, London
What the hell is perimenopause?
This is what I said when my friend suggested I was in it.
At 39, I didn't expect to even be thinking about menopause, let alone be thrust into it head first!
But that's what happened... Out of nowhere, a myriad of symptoms hit me...
Massive fatigue, very low moods, weight gain and brain fog.
Actually, I didn't really know what brain fog was either but for me it was loss of memory, inability to focus and actually thinking I had dementia.
I have a pretty stressful job so I had put it all down to that but once the seed was planted about perimenopause, I started to do some research and I now fully believe this is where I am currently.
My symptoms fluctuate, some days I function pretty well - others, not so much. But now I at least I understand what's going on, it's taken away a lot of worry for me.
I'm really keen to start HRT but, like a lot of women, I'm struggling to be taken seriously by my GP as I'm 'too young'.
I'm not sure what else is ahead of me on this transition but I'm doing all I can to make it as manageable as possible.
S, 40, London
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